He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
