Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I love you. Go after that dick
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
