i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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