you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
