i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
