I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
