soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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