After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
