Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Why is your signature on my underwear?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
