My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Randomize
