pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
this just has baby written all over it
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
