dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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