that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I've blown a few things in my day
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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