It's Friday. Sex?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
