Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Blood and glitter go together right?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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