fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
