If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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