when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
A+ Viking dick
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
