Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
