:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
