This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
