but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
