Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize