You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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