We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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