but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
