I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
