Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
