I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
