I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
