You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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