Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
