Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
