So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Randomize