I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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