Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
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