at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
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