do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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