How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Randomize
