They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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