i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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