well you can't waste a boner
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize