community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
