OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
