i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
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