How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
