is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
