I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
