Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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