Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
